Amber Alert

Ok, to be fair this is not about a missing kid. If her name was Red we wouldn't be having this confusion. Here is what you need to know as of 2:30 on Wednesday.

Amber is doing great. We went to the hospital at 8:30 yesterday morning and got her checked in. Apparently when she has only a skimpy robe on she gets quite flirty and charmed all nurses into doing her bidding. The actual surgery went down at around 10:30 and she made it into recovery by 1:00. I got to see her at about 2pm, which is lucky for the hospital as I had read everything in sight include a Nat'l Geographic Explorer from May 2003. That's right, 2003.

Turns out that they did confirm that the nodule was indeed cancer and opted to remove the whole thyroid and not just the naughty half. She'll be on Synthroid medication from here on out. The good news is that the surgery went very smoothly and she was in such good spirits she was requesting all sorts of photos. You'll see, I promise.

Her only complaint is a scratchy throat from the breathing tube they shoved into her. I keep trying to buy her ice cream but all she wants frozen yogurt because the Dr. tells her she can't workout for 2 weeks. I do not like frozen yogurt. Dilemma!

She was assigned to room 206 at which point we discovered that she would be having a roommate for the night. Her roomie was in for something and was a huge fan of Billy Ray Cyrus, who I gather was/is in jeopardy of losing on Dancing with the (C-) Stars. Amber also discovered that in addition to some fine coughing fits, her roomie also had the snoring skills of The Big Guy (Tom Grundman). For those who don't know, that is a true feat of sound.

I sprung her out of the hospital this morning at about 10:30. Calcium levels are excellent. Pain is a 4.5 out of 10 off drugs and a 2.5 on drugs. No swelling and no bleeding either. All she wants to do is sleep. Thanks for all the well wishes and flowers, She/we really appreciate everyone being so good to us.

Amber has been so tough through this whole process, though she tells me that she never wants to have another surgery again. To quote, " I don't want another surgery, not even a boob job."
I didn't even know that was on the list and now it's gone.

T-Minus 24 Hours

Well tomorrow is the big day! I keep trying to admire my neck sans-scar. It’s hard to imagine that it will never look this way again. I’m hoping I will scar well, but you never know. I really like my neck. I think it’s one of my best assets. If I REALLY don’t like the way the scar looks, I can always Photoshop it out of any photos.

I had to fill out of bunch of paper work for the hospital last week, but the worst was the law of attorney. (That sounds totally wrong). But I had to list a few peeps of who would make decisions for me in case something happened, AND I had to check a box next to ‘Do not resuscitate,’ or ‘Prolong Life.’ How morbid is that? I’m sure this is standard for everyone who has a surgery, but I did not expect that!

I also picked up my prescriptions. I got vicodin for the pain, and they gave me a whole bottle! I’ve never taken it before, so I hope it doesn’t make me sick or cease any unpleasant reactions. I also picked up my thyroid meds called synthroid. (John thinks the name sounds like a robot). The doctor suggested I not take generic as it will be easy to get me on the right dosage in the begging. Let me tell you that I hope I get to switch to a generic brand soon, because the pills cost $25! That’s almost $300 a month! Do you know what $300 could do for my wardrobe?

On a serious note… what if I didn’t have insurance or didn’t have the funds to buy the meds? These aren’t even meds I’m choosing to take. There should really be some program for peeps that HAVE to take meds and don’t want to pay for them. I know Molly can relate to this… it’s not her fault she has narcolepsy! I know I shouldn’t complain… her pills are way more expensive and she has to take them twice a day!

Oh well… maybe I can sell my left over vicodin on eBay to help pay for the synthroid.

**Note: I’ll try to have John update the blog tomorrow to let you all know how it went!

Over, Under, and through the Window

This weekend I learned how to knit! Can you believe it? I recently learned how to sew (entry coming soon), and now I can knit!

On Saturday Stephanie, Ellie and I went to a free beginning knitting class in Atascadero. Overall I thought it was pretty fun, but I am looking forward to being able to do the motion w/o having to think about it. It is also kind of tough because it's hard to tell what you did wrong when you mess up. I guess there is a separate class on how to fix your mistakes. Even though I could have used those tips in the first class, I'm not sure if I would have remembered everything. We learned the basic knitting stitch, the Pearl stitch and how to start it and end it. (I can't remember the correct terms.)

Here is Ellie in action:

Here is Steph in action:

Here is my first practice piece:

I would really like to make a scarf next, but the lady said I would need two things of yarn, and I"m not ready to buy more just yet. I want to make sure I can make it look good before I spend any more money. I am tempted to do more sewing though. It seems like sewing some pj pants can be a lot quicker then knitting a scarf. We will see!

I'll Never be Tan!

Sorry for the delay in posts! This past weekend we went up north for a wedding and it was TONS of fun! It was so great to kick off my wedding season with such a great wedding. You will have to wait a tad for that post. I have about 550 photos to go through. Now I didn't take them all... Rebekkah totally helped out as well.

So yesterday I had my pre-opp appointment w/ my doctor, Dr. Malotte. I think it went really well, and I know so much more about what to expect.

As far as the surgery goes, they will first remove the right side of my thyroid and then while I'm still under they will send it to the lab where they will freeze it an slice it into thin strips and then check to see if it is cancer. (There is still about a 1 in 20 chance that it is not cancer.) If it is not, then they will sew me up. If it is, then they will remove the other half. If it is inconclusive, they will sew me up and then send the tumor off for further tests. If it comes back positive then I will have to go back under to get the other half removed. I know that stinks, but the Dr. said it's best not to remove half of the thyroid if it's good. He also said he thinks that it probably is cancer and that they he will most likely have to remove the entire thyroid. If they do remove the whole thing I will have to spend the night in the hospital so they can monitor my calcium levels. I was not expecting that I would have to stay the night. Do any of you know what I should bring? I was thinking my book, ipod, and clean undies. Will I have to sleep in the hospital gown? I forgot to ask that one. What about slippers? Should I bring those? I never thought I'd have to pack a bag if I wasn't having a baby!

The scar will be about 2-3 inches long on my neck. There will be many internal stitches that will dissolve, and one outer stitch. I guess it goes in one end, and holds the opening together under the skin, and then it comes out the other end. I'll have to get that removed at my post-opp appointment. I won't be able to get it wet for three days, so I will definitely be smelling ripe! Just Kidding. I'm sure I will shower, or maybe take a bath. Not sure what I will feel like.

The only bad news about the scar is that I cannot get it in direct sunlight for a whole YEAR! If I do I will put it at risk of turning the scar black! I was really shocked to hear this one. I mean I've got 5 weddings left to go to AND I'm in one! I cannot be pasty white! I guess it's seriously time to try to find a local place that does the spray on tans. I'm just glad that the scar will be on my neck. It would be much harder to shade if it were on my arm. At least if I'm working in the yard, or more importantly hammocking, I will be wearing some sort of hat. I also thought that Belize would be out for our vacation this year, but John said that I should be fine. Worse case scenario the Dr. told me that they can always remove the black scar and I'd just start over w/ a new scar. So at least there would be some hope... although I'm sure my insurance wouldn't cover that procedure!

The Dr. also told me about the risks. That wasn't the most pleasant thing to hear, but most of the probs happen less than 5% of the time or less than 1%. Under the thyroid are two tendons that are connected to your voice box. If one gets damaged I would have a windy voice, but if they are both damaged I would lose my ability to speak and would have to get a tracheotomy! Could you imagine? Well the doc said that's never happened to him before, but he did see a woman in Poland before who had that happen.

As far as radiation treatment goes, I'll have to take a two tests after the surgery to see if any of the cancer is still in my body. If it is, I won't need the radiation therapy that makes you loose your hair. He said I'll just have to take a radioactive pill that will kill the cells. So that won't be bad at all. He said he would talk more about that after the surgery.

I will be able to eat whatever I want after the surgery too, because the surgery is on the outer part of my throat. I was a tad disappointed as I wouldn't mind shedding a few pounds on a liquid diet.

I also asked to be put on the thyroid medication right after surgery. I don't want to risk being tired or gaining any unnecessary weight. He said he'd prescribe synthroid and I guess it takes about 6-8 weeks to get into my system. AFter that I'll probably have to have more blood tests to make sure the hormone levels are where they should be. He did tell me that in the 70's doctors prescribed the meds to some women with a stronger dose of the hormone so that they would have more energy and lose weight. That is what I totally wanted until he said that later they found that by doing that it caused osteoporosis. Dang!

He also said that I will need to wait two weeks until I do any physical activity, or anything that will increase my heart rate. So I will be able to go on walks, just not up any steep hills.

I did ask him if he or the nurse could take a photo of my thyroid after they remove it. He looked at me VERY strangely and said that he's never had a request for that...but if I show the nurse how to use my camera before the surgery he doesn't see why not! Sweet!!

So I think that's about all the info. Let me know if you have any questions! 5 more days until I go under!

Say What?

I thought you all might find this entertaining. It's a note I wrote for the Depot a few weeks ago. Can you find my three mistakes? As you can see my spelling has totally improved!!

Jesus and a T-rex

A few weekend ago when John and I were in Humboldt we were also able to attend Chloe and Allie’s (the twins) baptisms! What a treat! Well needless to say we weren’t THAT excited when we learned we had to be at church at 8:30am! John asked if we could show up at 9:30am for the baptism, and his mom said that would be tacky. Why must we be so tactful?

I will not state how long it had been since I had been to a regular (non holiday) church service, but the last one I went to I did not enjoy. However I thought this service was very good! I only zoned out a few times, but I really enjoyed it, and all of the singing. I’m sure most of the people were wondering who that Methodist was in the back singing off key!

Right when the first song started John told me to turn they hymnbook to page 398. So I did… where the heck was the song? I had no idea that the 398 was the hymn reference! Doh! Man am I a rookie or what? The Father also chanted The Lord’s Prayer, which I had never heard before. I was so excited that we had finally come to something I knew, and then I couldn’t even keep the tempo! Geesh! Allison (mother-in-law) totally impressed me though. She knew all sorts of songs, (not in the hymnbook), that were sung. I guess once I’m married to a Grundman for 30 years I’ll have it down.

One difference between the Catholic Church and Methodist Church is that kids are supposed to stay through the whole sermon. As a Methodist, the kids head off to Sunday School after the first few minutes. All four kids were unbelievably good during the sermon. I was so impressed. However I do think Jay’s words of advice, (before entering the church), helped: “You are entering God’s house. NO loud voices!”

John’s cousin Fred and his family, (Shan - wife, Sage - daughter, and Kyle – son), also showed up for the service. Kyle is about 2 and was making normal two-year-old sounds when Bowie turned around and said “Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Kyle! We are in church!” It was too funny! Most people would, at this point reference that old saying. How does it go? Oh yeah, the pot calling the kettle black.

After the service we then got ready for the baptism. Right before the father started the ceremony, Sarah looks at me and says “Amber! You are Allie’s godmother! Get up here!” I was in total shock! So I rushed up to the front pew with Jay, Sarah, Maddy, Bow, Sage, John, the twins, and Jenny (Chloe’s godmother and who we thought was the godmother of both twins). It was a tight fit!

Let me backtrack a bit. So about 6 months ago John’s sister Sarah had mentioned to him that John and I would be godparents to one of the twins. SWEET!!! I was SO exited, as I had always wanted to be a godmother to one of the kids. However we were told that the godmother of a girl had to be catholic and the godfather of a boy had to be catholic. Well it looked like things had changed w/ the new father taking over.

A few months before the baptism John talks to Sarah again, and then relays the message that I will not be the godmother because I was not catholic. What the heck? I was totally bummed. Oh well. But it seems that Sarah was just teasing John? Not sure… something major was lost in communication, and all I know is that I was totally left out of the loop! But it was such a great surprise to be Allie’s godmother! What an honor!

Here’s an action shot of the ceremony

The kids were a tad bit more restless during this second hour than the first. Bowie decided to interject his observations by shouting “JESUS!” and “GOD!” at two separate occasions, while the father was speaking.

He also asked Sage “Are you afraid of T-rexes?”

“Yes,” Sage replied.

“I’m not,” said Bowie. So tough.

Near the end of the ceremony, John and Jay lit candles for the twins that they will use on their first communions. From the side, Maddy and Bowie were trying their hardest to blow them out. It was one laugh after another I tell ya!

Then to top it off, right as we were finishing, Maddy stuck her nose into one of the flower arrangements and here was the result:

Here are Allie’s godparents:

Here are Chloe’s godparents:

One last family photo before we left:

After we headed over to John’s parents house for a great lunch. It was quite entertaining as you can imagine. Here are the girls and their mom w/ a cool cupcake cake.

As godparents of Allie and Chloe (for John) it is our duty to make sure she attends church every Sunday and is brought up with God in her life.

"Suck it Satan!" Quoteth the godparents.

The Wii Word

So with the Boo Stick being preoccupied with cancer, what does John do with his free time? Well the search for the new Nintendo Wii has ended. Driving back from Ukiah this last Monday, one of my lady sources finally came through for me.

Wait, back story first. The Nintendo Wii is the latest game system from the greatest video game company. See if these names ring some bells you old fogeys: Mario, Zelda, uhhhhh, Metroid. Crap, it turns out I only play Mario and Zelda. Anywho, the system is fully interactive. I swing in real life, my Mii (clever, I know) swings his little bat on screen. The system is so fat kid friendly that it suggests you take a break and go outside every 15 minutes.

So for my 30th birthday I told Amber I wanted 1 thing; that's right, a Nintendo Wii. They came out in Nov 06. But she soon encountered a problem. Wiis are in super high demand, and as the big day approached she couldn't lay her hands on one. I suggested to put all my lady friends on the job. Maggie spotted some in LA for $400. No good, I am notoriously cheap and they retail for $250. Molly A. was also on the hunt. Rebekkah scoured Walmart on a daily basis. No luck. So two weeks ago I was hanging out in Best Buy when I spotted an old co-worker of mine working the register. I slipped her my card, gave her a wink and a pinch, and was on my merry way.

Thank you Joy Grunklee and your employment at Best Buy. Joy called us on Monday at 3pm. Bad news, we were in Salinas; Good news, they received 15. Amber placed yet another call into the Wii phone tree and Jen got on it. By 3:40pm all Wiis were sold but I was finally one of the lucky ones.

Due to these great advances in technology Nintendo thumb is now a thing of the past. However, I have developed a rather more severe condition, referred to in Medical circles as Nintendo Elbow. Much like tennis elbow, except this nasty affliction can take hold indoors with no sun, ball, racket, or even shoes!!

Results of 4 days of game play:

Bowled a 258 game (real life 172)

Beat down 6 dudes in boxing (real life, yeah right! I'm what you call a lover)

Shot par over 3 holes (real life, don't ask)

Hit 8 home runs out of 10 pitches (real life 1 homer career)

Even my lady can roll now!

True athletes play fake tennis. Look at that form!

Also for those in the know, check the shirt. Triforce anyone? (That's Zelda for you laymen).

It's not planned yet, but all will be invited to Lebowskwii Fest. Bowling, Caucasians, and The Dude. All without rental shoes. Actually, without any shoes, as you know we are crazy about keeping our carpet clean.

p.s. Cancer is a Bitch. And to quote D-Jay, "Beat that Bitch"
p.p.s. Watch Hustle and Flow to understand p.s. reference. "Whoop that trick"
p.p.p.s. Sorry for the profanity.