THANKS!

Just a quick note to thank EVERYONE who left comments on my computer whoa post! I can’t tell you helpful they all were and we will now be ordering a new laptop this week! O happy day!!!!

Also, sorry for the lack of posts. John and I tiled our guest bathroom this weekend, and then had to get rid of the construction zone because my mom is coming to visit today! Needless to say there has been some intense cleaning going on. Why must I care how clean my house is when as a kid you couldn’t even see the floor of my bedroom? Being an adult sucks.

(Photos of the tile to follow once it's sealed).

What the F?

This afternoon when John came and picked me up for lunch I saw one of the GROSSEST things I had EVER SEEN on the hood of his car. In fact I could barely tell what it was…poop? Barf? A decomposed body? What was worse is that there was some dry liquid along with the mystery mound that had run down the front of the hood! It kind of looked like the liquid might have come from the mound…but if so, then someone or something had moved it out of the liquid! All I know is that I was totally grossed out and my lunch hour had just started!

I looked in the car at John and he wasn’t looking for my reaction or anything! I couldn't believe it. So I enter the car and ask him nicely,

Me: WHAT IS THAT ON YOUR CAR?

John: What are you talking about? (Was he serious? How could he miss that pile-o-poop/barf?)

Me: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

John: What are you talking about? (As he drives away)

Me: SOMEONE POOPED ON YOUR CAR!! At least I think it’s poop.

John: WHAT? Are you kidding me? (You could barely see the mound from inside of the car)

Me: How could you not notice that? Did you enter your car from the back?

John: Yup. Maybe some homeless man came and took a dump on my car! (The car was parked in the DMV lot over night as he’s trying to sell it).

Me: It does look like it could be human…but why would anyone crawl up on the top of your car and drop a deuce?

As we continue this banter in trying it figure out what the heck happened, John drove as fast as he could to the nearest car wash. Right before we entered, I stepped out to take a photo of it, since he HADN’T EVEN SEEN THE RUNNY LIQUID PART. (Click on it if you dare!)

John paied for the MAXIMUM EXTREME WASH and hoped that it had one of those high-powered roller brushes. It unfortunately did not, and every time a new brush would sweep buy we would do our best to see if the turd/barf/mangled corpse had been washed a way, but it hadn't. All the car wash did was spread it out so it looked even BIGGER!

John then realizes that he probably should have tried to scrub it off BEFORE the car wash! Duh! I told him just be thankful that he’s not the car behind us who will be getting their car washed with poop brushes.

Then it’s time for the air dryer…can you just imagine what happened next? Chunks of the barf START FLYING over the car windshield! It was SO GROSS!! It was like a really bad 3D movie, and not matter how far I slouched in my seat I couldn’t get away from the flying poo. Every time a chunk went airborne we would both let out helpless cries, along with some dry heaving sound affects.

After we exited the wash, John manned up and got a windshield brush to get the rest of it off the car.

What is worse is that the air blow dryer blew chunks of the mystery meat into the grill/vent!! John said it looked like ground turkey, raw hamburger, and something with hair. We think some animal, (possum, cat, raccoon), must have eaten some other animal, (bird, gopher, baby possum), which did not sit well with their stomach which cause a double explosion from both ends. That would at least explain why the solid matter was not touching the liquid matter. We still don’t know why the animal decided to empty out their contents on the car, but I’d really like too get a hold of the security tape from the DMV! I just really hope it wasn’t a homeless man who hates BMW drivers. Even so...I am sure glad we are getting rid of that car! Oh wait! I mean...is anyone interested in buying a 98' BMW? If so, let me know!

How Do I Choose?

So I need some help blog viewers…John and I are going to be getting a new computer but are having a hard time deciding on whether to get a laptop or a desktop. Actually it’s me who is having the hard time…John says he will get whatever I want. My current computer probably has about a year left before it will need to be replaced, however since I’m such a computer hog John feels as though he never gets to use it and would like his own. Hence the early purchase.

Sooooooooooooo that is where you all come in. Can you please leave a comment, (or send me an email), stating pros or cons for either type? Or stories that might help me make up my mind? Have you had both types of computers? Would you please give me ANY advice? I’m getting desperate.

Here are some of my pros/cons, (I wanted to save you the time if you think of some of the same things).

PRO LAPTOP:
The convenience of taking it ANYWHERE! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wished I could work on the computer in the car (On the straight stretches of course…I am prone to get carsick), or in the living room, in bed, outside…can you get wi-fi outdoors?

I could take it on client meetings to have easy access to the deigns I’ve created.

I’d be able to download photos, alter photos, burn CDs, work on blog entries and on any freelance work wherever I wanted.

CON LAPTOP:
After talking with John we realized there isn’t a real need to take the computer places, and that most places we travel to do have computers. (And I really can go 48 hours without checking my email…if I have to).

It’s only $300 cheaper than the desktop, which has a better system.

It would most likely be considered “John’s”, not mine. (I know…selfish).

Is it a pain to carry it around? Do I really want another bag?

PRO DESKTOP:
I would get the new desktop and John would get my old one. (More selfishness…but at least I’m honest!)

It has better features, (more memory, hard drive space…I think?), for only $300 more.

It would be great to use for my design work…it would be faster, and because of the HUGE monitor.

John says we could get a new desk with two workstations that FACE each other! How awesome would that be? (Sorry to make some of you gag).

CON DESKTOP:
Immobile computer…however since I’ve never had a laptop I wouldn’t know what I was missing…right?

I was hoping that after making this list things would be easier…maybe I should prioritize them? I KNOW! Maybe one of you will give me the answer I’m looking for!!

Nature's Garbage Disposal

You know it really amazes me…just when I think I have run out of ideas to blog about, the blogging gods take pity on me and answer my prayers. I will admit that I haven’t had the easiest time coming up with topics over the last few weeks. I like to keep things light and funny, but you know really…my life really isn’t a laugh a minute. I know! Can you believe it? Shocking I’m sure.

This morning when I left for work I saw something limp and furry lying in the road about 15 feet from our house. (I was really hoping it wasn’t someone’s pet cat.) As I drove by I really didn’t want to look, but I knew I had too, and you know you would have as well. I was really lucky that there wasn't blood or guts, and that it wasn’t a cat. It was a possum, and from the looks of it I think it might have just been a head wound. Poor lil’ fella. However I think I would have had more compassion had it not looked like a GIANT RAT.

(Are you starting to wonder how this is into could possibly turn into a compelling entry?)

So I get to work and a co-worker of mine, named Ken, asked me how I liked the nice dead rat in front of my house. (He lives a few blocks away and often walks his two cute dogs by our house in the mornings.) I told him it really did not make my morning and I’m hoping someone will come and pick it up. He suggested that John could make some possum stew for dinner…uh…no thanks.

Lunchtime rolls around and I head home to meet John. As I walk into the house, John says:

‘I'm so glad you didn't disturb the birds.’

Excuse me?

‘Check out our buddies on the front lawn.’

I look through our kitchen window to see two HUGE turkey vultures! One standing guard and one GNAWING AWAY AT THE BLOODY POSSUM CARCASS!!!!! It was SO GROSS!

I then got really mad thinking that someone threw that bloody body in our yard! I mean it’s bad enough to have poop in your yard, but a decaying animal? Come on! What will be next? A human limb?

John said he thought that the vultures might have moved the body into our yard. Aren’t they smart? They didn’t want to be dodging cars while enjoying their all you can eat buffet.

Soon after my anger died ed down came the embarrassment. We live right on a corner where a lot of people drive by. I can’t imagine how pleasant it must have been for our neighbors to see the two vultures chowing down like it's Thanksgiving! I only saw a few cars drive by, but about half of them drove by really slowly. I even saw one do a double take! SO EMBARRASSING!

The one vulture that was standing guard totally creeped me out. Like was he on attack mode? Could there have been a fight to the death with one of the neighborhood dogs if he came by to find out where the smell of death was coming from? I did see the birds switch rolls at one point. It was just so unsettling. Here they are during the festivity:

So John and I eat our lunch…all the while I’m trying block out the image of the bird ripping off the bloody chunks of flesh. Somehow I managed, but I have no idea how. I guess I was lucky that I wasn't eating tomato sauce.

As we were getting read to leave John ran back into the living room (from the kitchen), saying that he thinks a guy just drove by to pick up the possum! I totally didn’t think he was telling me the truth, but then he said that he was parked in the driveway!

So we crept back into the kitchen all quiet and hunched over, hoping that the dude doesn’t realize we are home. However we did have two cars parked outside, so I have the feeling he must have known someone was there!

So I grab the camera and capture this disgusting event on film. (You are lucky that the quality of the video greatly decreased after I uploaded it.)

John was crouching down right next to me, so that is why I tried to get him on the vid at the end.

Meanwhile I am already about 5 minutes late to head back to work, but then I can’t leave because his car is parked behind mine! Then after he got into his car it looked like he was writing up a report. I’m sure it included under observations: ‘Saw a glimpse of the home owners who were hiding behind their kitchen table.’

Finally he left and John said that I could always tell my boss that the reason I was late was because a county vehicle was blocking my car because he had to pick up a dead possum in my yard. And if that didn’t work I could tell her to ask Ken because he could back me up on this one.

Burger? No Thanks.

In preparation for seeing the Sex and the City movie, John and I have been watching old episodes of the show. Well that is partially true…John just figured out that we have HBO on Demand, and we now have free, (with a subscription to HBO), access to some of the episodes! Now that we have access to them, we figured this was a perfect time to watch them.

I had forgot how much I loved that show until after we watched the first episode! Each lady is so unique in her own way, which makes me love them all for different reasons. Except for Carrie…I find her kind of blah. Well her personality is kind of blah. Maybe that is why the costumer gave her the funkiest clothes? To distract us from her blah personality? I think her blahness is what allows all of their eccentric personalities to get along.

The season that we are watching is the final season where Carrie dates Burger. Now I know you have to remember Burger…AKA ‘Mr. Post-it.’ I remembered from the first time I watched the season that I really did like Burger and was sad that it didn’t work out between them. (I don’t know if my love for Office Space influenced that hope or not). However this time I had a totally different view. Right from their first fight, (which they did in every episode), I thought ‘oh these two should not be together!’ Talk about friction! I could just tell they would never last. Now I know what you are thinking…and I didn’t think that because I knew the outcome. But seriously…with every fight in every episode, I was yelling at the TV ‘BREAK UP ALREADY!’ Please get out that post-it pad and end this dysfunctional mess!

I couldn’t believe that 5 years ago I actually liked Burger and wanted them to stay together! Was I in La-La Love Land like Charlotte? I couldn’t believe how much my view(s) had changed over the past 5 years. It actually made me pretty happy that I am able to look at a relationship and see beyond what is on the surface. I have known that I am getting better at this, but I didn’t realize how naive I used to be. Talk about me really being in La-La Land!

Now I’m wondering what has caused me to change over these past 5 years. Is it because I got married? Is it because I’m getting older and wiser of the ways of the world? Or is it because I’ve been hanging around more and more dysfunctional people that are easy to dissect?

I really am happy that I am more insightful. It not only helps with other people’s relationships, but also with work relationships. I actually find it fun to figure out the real reason why someone really said what they said. Are they hiding or scared of something? It’s kind of like being an older and wiser Nancy Drew.

I’ve even been able to catch myself saying things I don’t mean because I’m feeling a certain way. I haven’t been the best at stopping myself before the words come out of my mouth, but after I realize it’s too late I then try to say something to counteract it. Not really the best move…actually that is the worst move I could make. If anything that just makes me look suspicious, or that there is more to the story.

On a positive note…this is the first thing I consider good about growing old! It can only get better with time right? I mean our bodies are getting worse, so hopefully our minds will balance it out…until they reach their peak and start to go downhill, right? Anyone know when that peak is? I need to mark it down on my lifetime calendar.

Good Times!

On Friday John and I headed over to Clovis to visit our friends the Pearce’s. We hadn’t seen them since their wedding in October and it was so good to catch up with them! We also got to meet their puppy Dakota. She is a goldendoodle and SOOOOO cute! She was so excited to have company in her house that she kept doing these mini circular laps where she would circle completely around John and I., kind of doing figure eights. She was so friendly and had the softest hair/fur! Plus since she is part poodle she doesn’t shed. She would definitely make you want a dog.

Anyway, Brianne and Daniel took us to dinner to a teppanyaki grill restaurant, which was SO good! Of course we ate way too much, but it was totally worth it. Keeping with the same theme, the breakfast place they took us to the following morning was equally as good. It was in Old Town Clovis, which was really neat.

I was so glad we go to stop by and visit them since they are kind of in the neighborhood of Bakersfield, and since we don't take too many trips East I knew we had to take advantage of it. They seem so perfect for each other…totally respectful, polite, nice, and caring. It’s nice to see two people who are good together and are such a joy to be around.

After our tasty breakfast we headed over to Bakersfield. I wanted to stop by Jo-Anne’s Fabrics if possible to look for fabric for our shower curtain, so I just typed in the name in the GPS and wa-la it took us right there! Ever since John got a GPS for work I LOVE it! It is so great to travel with...I mean to go look at the houses he's selling.

After Jo-Anne’s we realized that we probably needed a snack to tide us over since we ate a late breakfast and probably wouldn't ave having any lunch before the BBQ. So what did we do? We typed in Jamba Juice and wa-la! It took us right there. I cannot tell you how helpful having a GPS would have been when I lived in the bay area. That was even before mapquest/Google maps. I was got lost all the time.

I got a few good photos of the fam, but of course now I wish I would have gotten more, or at least a group shot. Dang it!

Here is a sweet self portrait of John and Molly:

Here is Jane showing John and Lisa some sweet video on Val's computer. As you can see Val is more than thrilled about the situation.

After we stuffed our selves with a fabulous meal, we played a couple rounds of poker. It was really great because I started out and won the first two hands! I knew I should have called it quits, but the dang gamblin’ bug got me and I stayed in…and didn’t win another hand! I know totally crazy. Good thing we were only playing with coins.

After casino night we went and saw the new Indy movie. Now everyone I have talked to hated the ending, however I didn’t think it was that bad…however I’m sure the fact that I started to doze off a bit in the end had nothing to do with my final opinion. Yeah I saw a hint of a spaceship, and yeah the alien looked a little cheezy, but it seemed like that was such a small part of the movie. I can’t help it if I’m old, and that the 8pm show was sold out so we had to see the 9pm show. I’m tellin’ ya I’m old.

We got to stay with John’s Aunt Jane and his cousin Val. We always have so much fun when we are around them. I have the feeling that Jane and I do have an unspoken connection because we are both ground hog babies…plus she is the youngest child in her family, and you know how the youngest are always so serious.

Anyway, we went out to breakfast on Sunday, and Jane and I ordered the same omelet, except I asked for no onions and she asked for no bacon. So the dishes come and the waitress asked if I had no onions, and I said yes, so she gave me my dish, but as she was handing the other dish to Jane she realized it had bacon in it. So back she went to the kitchen. I felt kind of bad, but I was hungry, so I dug in…that is until I saw about 5 onions in my first bite! Let me tell you that these were not large onions, but tiny ones...that were distributed all through the omelet. I did try one bite and all I could taste were the onions! Then I realized that my omelet didn’t have bacon either…wait a sec! I got Jane’s order! CRAP!

When the waitress came back with Jane’s new plate, I had to send mine back. I’d normally pick out the onions in a situation like that, but there were WAY too many to deal with.

We got to see Gramp again on Sunday at his house, and I tried to download Adobe Reader for him, but his computer has Window’s ’98 and Adobe doesn’t have an option to download their program for that operating system. I was pretty disappointed that I couldn't get it to work, when I actually knew how to help them.

John and Gramp

After we said our good byes we went and overloaded on dairy, and then headed back to Jane’s. I was able to rock my tech support skillz for her, and helped her download some photos from her new camera. At least I was 1 for 2 in the IT dept. John and his dad then did some small fixer upper projects…like install Val’s toilet paper roll holder that had been MIA for the last 2 years! Let me tell you she was SO thankful.

Even though we left later than we wanted, it was totally worth it. We had such a great time this past weekend seeing everyone, hanging out, and just having fun. Jane and Val might be moving by the end of the year, so I’m thinking we might need to make another road trip later this year. As long as I tell John that there will be a milkshake in it for him, I’m sure he will be game.

Dairyville

We had a great weekend in Bakersfield this past weekend. Of course we got home pretty late tonight, so all you get is a few photos.

One of John's goals for the weekend was to go back to Dewar's to get a George's Special, (chocolate, banana and nut shake.) Jane and Val took us there for years ago, (yes it had been four years...I know that is awful...but we did go over last March, but only for a day), and John's mouth has been watering ever since we went. Last time neither John nor Val were able to finish their shakes, but this year they accomplished their goal!

I went into my photo CD archives and dug up this beauty from our trip back in 2004:
I'm not sure why John's eye are so squinty. Anyway...make a note of that stuffed ram in the background.

When we were there today we sat at the counter again, and John noticed the ram's head and we all thought it was a little odd that it was A) just sticking out of the wall in a slight random local, and B) what the heck was it doing in an ice cream shop? I was very excited to see that 4 years ago the ram was in fact on the wall, but now it has a lovely scenery around it:
Here is Jane and Val enjoying their George's Specials. Jane is totally acting like a cool cat in this photo....so John had to impersonate her:
I of course had the easy job of impersonating Val, since she always looks good. I did not opt for the George's Special since I'm not a big fan of banana. I decided to get a peppermint shake which was GREAT and also made me think that it was Christmas time. Although that didn't last long once we left the shop and entered the furnace of 88 degree weather.

More to come...